The Lost Childhood

THE LOST CHILDHOOD

  “Ëach was a crystal in which child dreamed that he saw life moving”.This line of Graham Greene shows remarkable understanding of the influence of books on a child’s wavering personality because childhood is a period which can not rest for long against any one particular thing.This essay is an autobiographical sketch in which Greene tells us of the writers he has read in the early formative years of his life and the way they influenced the course of his own writings.The books on the shelves at home appeared to be waiting for the writer in his childhood. Each book appeared to him as the crystal or the magic globe of fairy tales predicting  in their fashion the fate or the destiny of a child.In the same way these books read in the childhood appear as the books of divination or act as fortune teller who sees a long journey in the card.That is why the books in childhood excite a child a lot and he waits for the new edition with a missed heart beat therefore this excitement is  incomparable with the mild expectation of civilized pleasure of mature age.

According to the writer the books in his possession reflected the various aspects of life just like the crystal , showed him the future possibilities of life.Life in all its possibilities and potentialities became open before him like a “brave new world” of Shakespeare’s Tempest or open Sesame of “The Arabian Nights”.The books thus became a medium through which the writer could see the reflections of life.It was a mirror in which he saw all forms of movements and activities of life.It was a picture in which he could find ideas,feelings and plans of all kinds of people.It was thus,he related his own observations and experiences with the books before him.Then he got ideas about his own future from the books that he read one after another.

He could imagine the life that he would be leading in future with the help of books with him. His life of action could be that of characters in the books. These books exercised a deep influence on his mind. They opened a variety of opportunities for him. They fashioned the mode of life the writer adopted in his later years. Thus Captain Gilson’s “The Pirate Aeroplane” about a lost civilization in the Sahara desert and pirates playing games with the hero, had a deep impact on his memory and he could not eliminate it from his mind all his life.He mentioned this incident in one of his novels later on. The writer decided to join Nigerian Navy after reading several romantic tales of different writers and story of ancient witch Gagool. His later adventurous career in Africa was partly the result of the influences of witch’s story on him. He recreated his experiences in Africa on the basis of his earlier readings of Gagool .He shared the belief of African in the witch when he and they sat in their huts thinking that bush devil was moving there. At that time he fell ill with fever on camp bed in Africa. It was a small hut and in the dim light of candle, rats moved across the room. It was the story of witch Gagool that toned up his spirits and he bore the hardships of life with patience.

Gagool remained a permanent part of the writer’s imagination as he said “didn’t she wait for me in dreams every night in the passage by the linen cupboard,near the nursery door?and she continues to wait, when the mind is sick or tired…….”In the same way the character of Quartermain and Curtis,with their valour and courage remained a permanent source of inspiration to the  writer throughout his life. “They were the men of such unyielding integrity that the wavering personality of a child could not rest long against those monumental shoulders”.A child cannot resist the influences of such man as to show extraordinary courage in fighting against evil.These men to him were ideals of existence in bravery and courage.

Finally the novel of miss Bowen “The Viper of Milan”supplied him once and for all with a subject and all the possible futures like potential civil servant,the don and the clerk slid away and had to look for other incarnations.He learnt from the characters of the story that goodness was a rare thing in life whereas evil could be found at most places in life.He came to know that “ human nature is not black and white but black and grey”.He came to know that perfect evil populated the world but there did not exist perfect goodness, and only pendulum ensured that after all in the end the justice was done.

The writer wished to have selected some other occupation instead of becoming a writer but what was the use of wishing that.So the books are always there, the moment of crisis awaits, and now our children in their turn are taking down the future and are opening the pages.And these books will act in the same way as they have shown the path to the writer like crystal globe which clearly indicates the way for a child because these books are like a map in the wild jungle of childhood ans a child traces his way through these guides and follows them.

Prepared by :Syeda Misbah Kazmi